Low

I had a big cry today, right after performing the Maghrib's prayer. Somehow i just don't know how it could happen. Since I am pregnant I am not keep tracking my blue moon. So when I am having a situation like this it also made me confused. Does it the hormone factor it just me?

So today, the thing made me cry was when I am talking to my little caliph in my tummy. Just so he/she know that both of us should be strong in facing all the tests together.

My soulmate was went to Jakarta for 2 days for a meeting and i already missing him. :)

Happiest person on earth

I am the happiest person on earth when my husband unexpectedly came home to Malaysia this weekend due to a short meeting. \○/. love you hubby~ ♡♡♡

04.11.2015

Sakit itu kifarah dosa

November is one of my fav month. Being tested by him with a sickness early of November until today and I realised it could help swap away my sin. As I am kept whining and being sad all the time, my husband keep on supporting me even we are far apart. It just lately I am not that the same strong person when I am not carrying our little caliph. 

By Wednesday of next week, InsyaAllah our little caliph will be 5 months old in my womb. Pray for the good things and be a healthy person. 

And almost everyday i misses my husband very much. Even he was away for only a week, I've a month waiting for him to come home to Malaysia. I think, maybe I should change my doa during prayers to be more specific and sound demanding so that my dearly sayang could come home soon to Malaysia to be with me and little caliph.

By the way, Happy Birthday to me, 29 years old on 4th November. The last year to cherish the 20's life :)

Pray for the good things for me, be a healthy person and be a strong person to lead the life ahead. 

14 weeks

I am 14 weeks pregnant. Twice going to the clinic (1) on 6 weeks to confirm the pregnancy (2) on 9 weeks to open the pink book. Since I am going to the private clinic, each time of visit will have a scan session. Alhamdulillah all of the sessions went well with my second visit had a chance to see the fetus' heartbeat. 

And for my third visit due end of this week, I am losing my faith. I prayed that it is not what I am thinking of. Noticing that the tummy aren't making a positive progress. That's what am afraid for. 

Hopefully everything will goes well. 

sharing~

Dari DMFK.

Suami isteri yang berpegang tangan itu berserta perasaan kasih sayang, maka akan gugurlah dosa-dosa kecil.

Married Life

 ' Married Life Is A Journey '

hye there

Its been a while since i am not writing in here. well, the month of may gave a sweet memory though. Dear husband was coming home on the day of his birthday wearing the birthday present that received 2 days in advance. Not much that i could say, that by being a long distance relationship somehow quiet difficult for us. 

And for the past 2 days even more difficult for me. Eating my lunch cum dinner at 5 pm that bought after went home for clinic, sitting at the dining table alone and be bless of the food - rice, fried ikan kerisi and fried vegi. Truthfully, I am thankful if i could eat that almost everyday, such a simple dish. 

Somehow, i pray that this sickness would swap out my sin. Amin. 

Ketenangan

Ada manusia itu mencari ketenangan dengan berkahwin - Dato Ustaz Kazim Elias

Saya bermuhasabah diri. Apa lagi yang perlu dicapai dalam hidup. Hidup yang hampir lengkap, mempunyai sara diri yang membolehkan makan pakai yang patut disyukuri. Mempunyai tempat berteduh. Hanya sedikit rezeki dariNya yang mungkin belum milik kami untuk melengkapkan hidup berkeluarga. 

InsyaAllah, janji Allah itu pasti. Usaha dan doa serta sabar. (^_^)v.

Us

That's us. Ya, we are really not so good when it come to selfie (- -,)

| Melina Beach Resort, Tioman Island April 2015 | ♡♡♡

La Tahzan

i should keep on repeating those word.

Bulan penuh

Saat pulang dari latihan bola jaring hari ini, sudah jam 7 petang. 

Bulan pun sudah memunculkan diri. Bulan penuh. Indah. Dan esok hari hujung minggu. Menanti penuh debaran untuk ke hari jadi itu. Semoga dipermudahkan segalanya. Amin.

mengingati mati

Saya pernah membayangkan satu senario seperti itu. Bagaimana ia terjadi jika saya keseorangan. Diserang serangan jantung, misalnya. Sebelum tidur, saya pernah membayangkan situasi seperti ini. Demi mahu menimbulkan rasa insaf tentang hampirnya mati. Saya dapat membayangkan keresahan rakan sekerja tidak dapat menghubungi saya setelah tidak hadir di pejabat. Saya membayangkan mereka ke rumah untuk bertanyakan khabar berita dan akhirnya menemui saya sendirian terlantar di rumah. Sedih. Kemudian terus membayangkan majikan atau kawan sekerja menghubungi sang suami tercinta nun jauh di perantauan demi mencari rezeki, tentang berita ini serta keluarga terdekat untuk menuntut saya. Menangis memikirkan ini semua. Saya menangis memikirkan apakah sang suami akan merindui pemergian saya, merindui saya. Adakah keluarga terdekat akan merasai tiadanya saya dan sedekahkan Al-Fatihah untuk saya sentiasa? Memikirkan semua ini membuatkan saya tertanya-tanya diri, adakah saya sudah bersedia untuk menghadapi mati? Dengan dosa yang banyak pada diri, dengan amalan bekalan di bahu kanan yang belum boleh menyebelahi dan berlawan dengan bahu kiri? Setidaknya saya perlu fikir amalan diri ini dari memikirkan "oh, usah gusar. wahai dunia dan insan yang saya sayangi, kamu kamu dan kamu kamu telah diwasiatkan serta dinamakan sebagai penerima". Sungguh. Mungkin hal-hal dunia seperti itu telah saya selesaikan dengan jayanya. Menunggu masa dan ketika untuk terlaksana.

Yang saya pasti, setidaknya pada bulan Ramadhan roh mereka yang mati akan turun ke Bumi dan melawati rumah yang diharapkan diterangi cahaya. Berharaplah bercahaya rumah itu, supaya jalan terus disuluhi, menerangi jalan untuk melihat sang suami. 

*tsktsk.

Syurga, Suami, Isteri

Syurga seorang isteri itu berada di bawah tapak kaki suami.

...

I can't take it positively in anything involving her. Seriously. I tried harder to see everything in a good way. I don't know why it has to be like this. The past memory kept coming back that make me treat her as it is. 

Beach boy

Hey, that's my beach boy. \(•_•)/

| Laksa Power, Langkawi December 2014 | ♡♡♡

A child.

I'd reduced my time browsing FB since married. Usually i am letting the FB apps login until I'd discovered that FB was the contributing factor that drained my phone's battery. Alas, the main factor was to avoid jealousy. 

Yup.

Despite of being happy in married life, yet i am or should i say we are, keen of having a children. Or lots. Five maximum, three minimum.

I restraint myself for not login to FB. Restraint myself for seeing other people enjoyment by expecting a children, having a children, updating status about their children. I am not mad at them yet I am gratefull for the rahmah and rizq that sent by Him to them that our turn yet to be. 

Turning to the 5 months of married life, long distance relationship, emotionally depressed, family issues. The list would go on. However, the counting was nothing compared to other married couple that expecting the same that probably was much more longer than me and there are some not distine for having any. 

I.should.be.gratefull.for.whatever.i.had.in.life.

Coming home

The husband is coming home. And I am in the midst of having a bundle of joy. (^__^)//

Don't talk mood

I just feel that I do not want to talk to anyone today. I do not want to talk to anyone about that topic. I do not want to talk to anyone.

Since that Year Planning had come out, I feel that I do not want to talk about it.

Finger nail

I'm cutting the finger nails yesterday. And that's remark the end of being the bride's signature. I'm gonna miss the red color of it after 4 months its with me.

Its sad because I'm not sharing this moment with him. Even more sad that i had foresee this things (me, cherish the greatz moment in life without him) long time ago, before we're married. 

T.R.Y

Sometime, when seeing the picture of us together, that feeling grows. And what's hurt was to contain that feeling so that it would not make my heart hurt. 

I'm hoping this kind of feeling would last forever. Would last till our last breath. Would last till the end of life and hereafter. Would last till Jannah. Because each time after my pray, i would recite the same doa. 

Tears gone stream from my cheek. And hoping it will soothe the ache. I am trying hard for us. I am trying hard to get through all of it. 

I am trying. And will keep on trying.

Well wishes

I only realize that when cleaning the house. That's came with the paper bag that contained birthday present of handbag and chocolate on last November :)

Somehow, i value the friendship with them. Seeing those, made me speechless.

...

Sleepless night for 2 days in a row. Body heat on the first night. 

Pray for strengths.